Here at Broken News, we’ve had enough. We’re drawing a line in the sand. We’ve seen too many headlines like these ones:
There is a growing internet trend towards reimagining Disney Princesses: changing their gender, their cultural background or even turning them into hotdogs and cement mixers. In the first place, we saw some merit in it. It was getting people to think. But it’s gone on too far. Here at Broken News, we’ve had enough and say it’s just not fair. Let’s give these amazing women their identities back.
So here goes: 8 Disney Princesses not re-imagined as anything. Just finally allowed to be their wonderful, beautiful selves.
Why in the world would you need to reimagine Cinderella as anything else? The quintessential Disney Princess, with her missing glass slipper and amazing golden locks? She’s one young woman just absolutely perfect the way she is.
If you reimagined Belle in any other way, she, well she just wouldn’t be Belle any more. And we like her as Belle. We remember her as Belle. Just let her be Belle. If you go changing her, don’t ask for whom the Belle tolls. We promise, it tolls for thee.
You might think it’s clever to reimagine Rapunzel with shorter hair, in a different gender paradigm, another universe or of an alternative ethnicity, but if you did that…she just wouldn’t be Rapunzel: fierce, inspiring, and with *that* amazing hair.
Under da sea, under da sea, there’ll be no accusations, just friendly crustaceans under da seeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeea. And that where Ariel belongs. She’s the Little Mermaid, not the Little Cement Mixer. So just let her swim around and be whoever she really wants to be.
We know you might be tempted to re-imagine Snow White as a more realistic model of modern femininity. We know she’s not the most realistic woman for our times, but she’s not meant to be real. She’s meant to be a cartoon character. She’s meant to be Snow White.
It takes enough imagining in the first place to pretend that there are magic carpets that fly through the sky and that Jasmine, an animated character, could be riding on one with Aladdin. So that’s enough imagining for one day, no need to reimagine her as anything else.
Don’t. Change. Her. She is amazing. She is incredible. And she was the title of her own Disney movie. What have you ever done that is as good as that? So don’t ever for a second, even just a second think about turning her into anything else. She doesn’t need your help.
Just. Let it go. Let it gooooooooooooo.