Former teenage heart-throb band Hanson look set to take three seats in the Australian Senate and hold the balance-of-power following an extraordinary result in the Australian general election.
Many pundits felt it would be impossible for Zac, Taylor and Isaac to secure a significant enough proportion of the vote to guarantee their senate seats, but with 60 percent of ballots counted, it now appears a near certainty.
“In an Mmmbop, they’re gone,” Hanson frontman Isaac told Broken News, in reference to the many senators who had lost their seats on election night. “They’re all headed for the Middle of Nowhere.”
While Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull had hoped a double dissolution election would help clear out the Senate, it appears to have achieved the opposite effect, with former Palmer United Party senators and Independents being thrown out, only to be replaced three American band members with no history in the Australian political system. The trio, who are originally from Tulsa, Oklahoma are not even Australian citizens.
When probed on their policies, the boys from Hanson remained coy. A band spokesperson told us: “After seeing many other former politicians singers make moves into politics, including Peter Garett, the boys from Hanson were desperate to give it a try. With the boys success in the ARIA charts in the late 90’s, they felt they already had a foothold in the electorate, among teenage girls now aged in their 30’s who idolised the band in years gone by.”
“NOT A DONE DEAL”
Constitutional experts tell Broken News that the Hanson boys will not be guaranteed a spot in Parliament because of their American heritage. “Given the boys are not Australian citizens, it would appear that a high court challenge based on their nationality could have their claim for Senate seats thrown out entirely.”
“That said, I think the boys will do a good job. I mean, if Ricky Muir can do it, surely anyone can.”